There comes a time when I have to admit to myself that I like starting over. The finish line feels good, but it is a climax following months of milestones. The victories achieved on the journey are sweet.
Along the way I have found myself derailed. Discipline seems to be the easiest thing to blame. Self discipline is the only kind at play here. There is no one here to punish me except the world in the largest sense, and myself in the most realistic sense. Punishing myself is a sort of specialty.
If I do not achieve I simply remain stagnant and that could be ok. If I fail or fall I could lose material things. But that is just a perception. A medal or trophy truly means nothing. Money means nothing. It is the sense of satisfaction and personal success that is the ultimate measure in some ways. It is the legacy of what is left behind in others that makes an accomplishment successful.
Every day is the chance for a fresh start. When I decide it is day 1, I feel alive. When I get back up off the baseline again after fucking it all up and decide, "YES I am going to do this," I don’t care about yesterday. If I have TODAY, I am victorious. Every day is day 1.