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Cheers to Suzette

How long does it take before you can really say a person affected your life? Does it take one year, one decade, or just one hour? A few months ago I walked into the office of Suzette DeJarnette and in her first sentence I was affected. "Hello, I am Sharon Vaughn. How are you today?" I asked this question in my usual first-meeting, sales-girl voice. As she was to counsel me on my deepest thoughts and issues I naturally assumed the enthusiasm of her response would reflect all the happiness she wanted me to find following our time together. "I'm medium today,"  Suzette replied honestly and instantly informed me of her credibility. Though I enjoyed her honesty I also I admit to being nervous. In my new-found pursuit for authenticity, I feared I would not have the luxury of filtering myself to gain a favorable judgement from her. But it (and she) was all just what I needed.

Our hours together were short and memorable. She was an original feminist, a straight shooter and a rock star among her peers. She let me tell her all the things I thought about myself, where I went wrong, and where I should change - and then helped me course correct. I told her my tale of trauma and heartbreak to which she replied, "Your shit-meter was broken." Never were truer words spoken. She reminded me that I was important enough to set boundaries and make priorities for myself even if I am giving of myself to someone else. I told her about my desire to help someone who hurt me and immediately learned two of her golden rules for when one is called upon for assistance. #1 - Do I feel like it? And #2 - Will it be appreciated?

Were it not for my time with her I could have easily forgotten myself, lost my "shit-meter" once again and fallen back into the abyss which led me to her in the first place. It took only a few hours with her for Suzette to help me correct the course of my life, realize my value and strength, and for me to deeply appreciate the value and beauty of my time with her. Even after she fell ill, Suzette influenced me and my family until finally Saturday she passed away. Since she favored Buddhism I would imagine she'd understand my grief but hope I could find peace in the universal nature of death as well as the continuing life of her spirit.  I have shed my tears, and now I simply say, "Cheers, Suzette!" I know the spirit she embodied will live on in me and my ability to live my best life.

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